I realize that I sound like a grumpy, old curmudgeon—and this is not entirely inaccurate—but when I was a kid, pumpkin patches were just farms where you could buy pumpkins, not the huge affairs with hay rides and pony rides and food vendors (and petting zoos, bouncy castles, haybale mazes, craft fairs, and so on, and so on) that I see these days. There was a time when the excess of it all did, in fact, make me grumpy. But you know what? These new-fangled pumpkin patches? They're pretty fun. And the kids love going.

Look at how un-curmudgeonly I'm being. I'm as surprised as you are. Go me.