Rennik's Prayers, Lots of Internal Monologue, An Answer?
Subject: Re: where do we go now
Are Sa'id and garyth going to answer this?
I need to know what to do before writing the next turn.
From: Raja
Subject: Re: where do we go now
Sa'id's gaze flicks back and forth between Rennik and Mission, but he doesn't speak until he notices a glaring ommission.
"No one has mentioned Elise." He lets her name hang over the party like a shroud before continuing: "She could destroy us all, but despite what has happened to Cadfael, his presence still shields us from the sight of Kor Garesh and his minions - including Elise."
Sa'id looks directly at Rennik. "If you leave us again, I suspect she will find and kill you. You seek to warn your people and I believe she will not allow that to happen. I think we can only hope to escape Kor Garesh now by remaining with Cadfael, mad though he may be. I don't wish to see you die, nor myself - but Mission saved my life twice and I have promised to help him save his boy. I believe that if we do succeed, Kor Garesh will be sufficiently delayed and his minions sufficiently confused that there will be time to warn Huss of the coming darkness."
"I believe you when you say attempting a trek through the jungle is madness, but I would rather be killed by swamp dragons than by Elise. Swamp dragons wouldn't take pleasure in rending the flesh from my bones as painfully as possible. Swamp dragons wouldn't sacrifice me to a murderous and vengeful god. If I die in the jungle, at least my soul will be at peace."
"I must go with Mission."
From: Matt
Subject: Re: where do we go now
Rennik's attention snaps to Sa'id at his words, confused and angry.
"What do you know of this dark god's attentions?!? What about our mad priest shields us from anything?!? He is in the service of this dark god - he bears a ring of vile magery that does not blind this evil, but draws its attention!"
"Have we not just been set upon by darkness and madness? Were we not almost killed because they knew exactly where we were heading, and exactly what path we took? How has our closeness to this madman protected us from this god? What do you know, spellweaver? What knowledge do you keep from us?"
Before Sa'id has a chance to react, Rennik will push on.
"And what do you know of the she bitch? How would she know what I seek - does she read minds?!? Do they not *want* us to turn back? Do they not want us to run from the mountain? *Why else* would they put obstacles in our path, but to turn us away? If anything, I was attacked by the she-bitch because I moved *toward* the mountain, and found the map that would lead us to them. What would they gain in diverting their energy toward a fleeing adversary, when others are still forging forward?"
"And your ignorance of this jungle makes your decision even more laughable. I would MUCH rather a fight with Elise than a swamp dragon, or any of several other creatures in this jungle. Elise is a human, and can be beaten. She may be strong, she may be able to wield dark magics, but she is an adversary who can be fought head-on. A swamp dragon is not - nor are any of the poisonous reptiles, amphibians, insects and plants that can cause just as painful a death, without any hope of success."
"I can respect your life debt, though my soul mourns that you have bound yourself to such a one as this monk..."
Calming, he sighs heavily and shakes his head slowly from side to side. He speaks to the ground in the halfling tongue of his people, almost in prayer, but not to any one god in particular. It almost seems as though he is appealing to the forest, or the spirits of the plants and animals that surround him. It is not an appeal to any deity, but to the forces of the world.
"I know not what to do. I am empty, and my goddess has abandoned me with fools and madmen. The path forward reeks of death, and the path behind is treacherous. Evil has come to my people, and I am powerless against it. I have been beaten and my weapons broken, humbled before the world. I am a wolf set upon by predators, surrounded and protected only by blind, toothless cubs. What am I to do? How might I be like the river, or tree? How might I be like the wind, or rain? How am I to know my direction, my place in the world?"
Opening himself to his surroundings, he blocks out the humans, ignoring any words they may speak or pleas they may make. If they leave without him, he would scarcely notice and care even less. It is as though they have faded away, and Rennik is left with his thoughts and the wild.
From: Ty
Subject: Re: where do we go now
A turn coming tonight.
From: Mike
Subject: Re: where do we go now
Did you guys get [my] email when it went out yesterday? It seems like the responses, especially Ty's, indicate that some of you may have missed it.
From: Raja
Subject: Re: where do we go now
[OOC: This email is entirely composed of internal monologue. It doesn't actually affect the game. I did get Mike's email yesterday.]
Sa'id listens to Rennik's angry words in dismay. The halfling's arrogance and narrow worldview had clearly blinded him to all logic and reason. His devotion to his people was admirable, but his mistrust of humans would likely be his demise.
The dark-skinned wizard's eyes flick over the rest of the group. Of them, Cadfael was mad, Rennik and Mission were single-minded and obstinate in the pursuit of their goals... Garyth at least had good intentions, and Farron was possessed of wit. But none of them, it appeared, could see the situation with the same clarity as himself. If Mission saved Promise, he would return to seclusion with his order to raise and safeguard his son. Cadfael would... Cadfael would most likely die. Garyth and Farron would return to Overlook and the former at least would aid in its defense. Rennik would be dead.
..leaving a lone, outcast necromancer to tell the Isle of Huss what was coming to devour it? To somehow convince the cities and towns to combine their forces against the undead and soulless, these blasphemies against the natural order of life and death?
Fools.
None of them even respected his power - with the possible exception of Farron. None of them paid any mind to the destruction he was capable of wreaking, and it was clear that few if any of them respected his intellect. They'd ignored his bluff in the tower, ignored the skeletons he had incinerated at the lodge, and only Mission had bothered to protect him in battle - but Mission must view him as a child, always needing to be followed around to make sure no one accidentally killed him. And for this he owed the monk his life, though he wasn't sure that the other man even cared about it beyond what aid Sa'id could lend in his effort to save Promise.
If only he could simply ride the waves back to Ammar, to the windswept sands of his homeland. Bid'di a'rooh, bas lasim... khara. But the darkness would not be confined to Huss. Gods were not so easily sated. For the thousandth time, Sa'id curses the entire pantheon for his mother's life, but now he also curses them for what they have wrought among the members of this small group.
His black mood is brightened somewhat by a flicker of hope in the back of his mind. He does have SOME respect for these strange people whose company he keeps. Mission, though single-minded, was noble. Garyth was brave. Farron was cunning. These three at least might TRY. If he could convince them. Perhaps if the world was able to rid itself of Kor Garesh, it might realize that it did not need ANY of the gods... The oppressiveness of his surroundings keeps true optimism at bay, though, reminding him that they would all most likely die before even reaching Anileth and Promise.
Shaking his head, he moves to stand with Mission, Garyth, and Farron.
From: Scott
Subject: Re: where do we go now
:applause:
From: Matt
Subject: Re: where do we go now
Yes, Mike, I did get your email. Rennik just has no interest in Garyth's words at the moment. To him, quite frankly, sticking together with Mission and Cadfael has become equated with failure and death.
I probably should have had Rennik acknowledge that Garyth spoke and then wrote off his words, but his reaction to Sa'id's totally out of the blue speculation about Cadfael took precedence. Oops! Sorry 'bout that.
I'm reaaally having trouble justifying Rennik sticking around with the group, though. We'll see what the spirits of the land have to say. o_O
From: Raja
Subject: Re: where do we go now
You just don't love us anymore.
Rennik's Int is just too low to see how right Sa'id is. ;)
From: Matt
Subject: Re: where do we go now
Just as an aside...
That information about Cadfael and the Kor Garesh blindspot is a new entry into the public domain... no one knew about that yet. There was some evidence, but it had never been stated outright. That's why Rennik responded with such hostility - he didn't make the same mental leaps of faith that Sa'id did. Ty says that Sa'id could have figured it out with his high Intelligence, but he presented it to Rennik as a "duh, you should know this" fact... which made the halfling blow his top.
Just so you didn't think I was just being ornery. :)
Though I am curious how everyone else is taking that news... or processing that information.
From: Raja
Subject: Re: where do we go now
Ah, but what you're forgetting is that Sa'id assumes his own word to be gospel for everyone else.
:-P
From: Raja
Subject: Re: where do we go now
..so you're supposed to believe him because he believes himself to always be right. :)
From: Dan
Subject: Re: where do we go now
Cadfael reaches the edge of the clearing and stops as though the trees were a wall. With trembling fingers he reaches out to touch a trunk and looks up through the canopy of branches, the sun casting a patchwork shadow across his face.
..."You will DIE if you follow the PRIEST"...
Cadfael grits his teeth to hold back the tears and presses his cheek against the wood. Damp enough that, should he lose control, he need not feel the wetness on his face to be reminded of it. So tired. Always reaching, clawing to stay at the surface, to stay aloft. Someone had fallen, hadn't they? He could see her falling from his arms, burning with fever. So fragile, laying there on the floor. He had felt that if he breathed to hard she might blow away... And yet, somehow it had been he who had shattered and was left with a handful of pieces that kept slipping through his fingers.
..."I have faith in Cadfael"...
Faith... No matter how he threatened and raged his faith still walked beside with him. He could still feel its lingering touch. Desperately he wanted to destroy it for all it had done. To burn it, to punish it, to -- What had it done? ... It was why he was here, it was hard as rock and demanded his blood! It kept his feet on the path to his fate. A fate *he* wanted no part of... but it mattered so to Pelor. Mission? Faces were blurring behind his eyes.
..."If I die in the jungle, at least my soul will be at peace"...
A pardon? Forgiveness? Or, perhaps reassurance that this path lead to a promise. What sins cannot be forgiven? Could the death of a man, a mother, could these be washed away? And, more dearly, could the breaking of a spirit be put in the past? He yearned to regain that trust, but perhaps he had lost it forever. Could he ever forgive Pelor for the wounds he had inflicted?
..."we have strength and hope only together"...
Kor Garesh, the Darkness was the only hope the Light had. Somehow there had to be room for both in his heart, he had to surrender to each. He was the key to the other, the fate of two Gods lay in his shaking hands. They had each set him up to fall and he knew in falling he was to take one with him. So much depended on him that his way had been set with golden and obsidion markers and despite it all he still felt lost.
..."I am empty, and my goddess has abandoned me with fools and madmen"...
How could he be filled with the strength of two Gods and still feel so hollow? Alone with no company but himself. It was not right! The Gods are just that, Gods. And two had staked their fates with him. With the power of two Gods behind him could he not choose his own path? Cut out in a direction of his choosing?
But no. All this talk of emptiness, Gods and madmen was nothing but the whisper of his pride whirling in his mind. And now, now he was too exhausted, to close to his purpose to hold on to that and Gods. The time had come to make his peace and set his pride on a new direction. It could not be left to eat away inside him, to lead him astray. He would be lost without him, he could see that now. Cadfael closes his eyes as a feeling of clarity settles in and waits for it to give him direction.
"Rennik!"
His heart beats faster. Very near to a panic Cadfael runs across the clearing. Where is the Halfling? There, in a stupor, mind closed to the world.
"Rennik," he says softly, kneeling before him and gently holding his face in his hands, "I need you. Your people need you. You were spared the visions I have seen, but Rennik, too many halflings have given their souls to only be members of a forgotten tribe. It has spread beyond the members of the Murrkat. Remember your cousin? A good man, a strong man, and lost to you. There is no home to return to. At least, no home beyond 4 walls. No home to hold on to. We have lived under Kor Garesh's spell for too long, though we did not know it. You are not here to hunt the wereboars, you never were! Your hunt is for their Master. Vengeance is not God's way, you know that. It is salvation that we are striving for. Promise be damned, he is not my child and merely a means to an end. But he must live for there to be any hope at all."
Cadfael's grip tightens on Rennik's face and the stink of sweat fills his nostrils. "Come back to me, I cannot find my way on my own."
From: Raja
Subject: Re: where do we go now
Wow.
From: Matt
Subject: Re: where do we go now
Rennik barely hears the priest's words, but the basics of their meaning registers in the recesses of his mind. Still with a distant look in his eye, he looks up at the priest, studying his face, the darkened eyes, the haggard cheeks. The halfling cocks his head to the side, as an animal might, one that has seen a something totally out of its ken.
Slowly, he puts his hand on Cadfael's shoulder, gripping his armor and clenching his eyelids shut. Gritting his teeth, he speaks in the halfling tongue, words of sorrow and dismay. "My kin, lost. My goddess, lost. My people..." He looks up into the priest's eyes. "...lost."
Suddenly the faraway look in his eye focuses, and hardens. With lightning speed, he draws the dagger from his boot and presses it against Cadfael's throat, gripping the collar of his armor tightly with his left hand. (OOC: He will make every effort to keep Cafael's chest between the dagger and the rest of the party, blocking their sightline of his actions)
Still in the halfling tongue, he whispers, "Spinner of lies... offal of a dark god..." The mad priest may have fooled the monk, speaking the words he wanted to hear, convincing him to stay his hand. But Rennik harbored no delusions of the usefulness of the priest, the pawn of Kor Garesh. He would not be so easily duped.
A growl rises from the back of his throat...
From: Ty
Subject: An answer?
Rennik grips Cadfael's armor and holds his dagger to the priests neck. This rejection of the cleric's attempt to reach out seems to twist something in Cadfael, and his face goes dark. Rennik sees this, but does not move to withdraw his weapon. Blood is about to be spilled.
Both men hear only their own panting breaths, and something about the party's silence seems strange. Is no one going to even attempt to stop them from killing each other? Rennik looks away first, though the dagger never wavers from Cadfael's throat. When he does not look back at the priest, Cadfael risks a glance as well.
The rest of the party stands in silence, staring at a large gray wolf that has just entered the clearing. There is something about the creature that demands such attention. Certainly it has a regal bearing, standing without fear as it looks at the group. But mostly, it is the eyes. They are deep, and intelligent beyond the norm for such a creature. It does not turn away when it meets the eyes of on of the group.
Farron, who has lived on the island all his life, has never seen a wolf here before. He begins to speak, then stops with a puzzled look on his face. Sa'id, who has recently discovered that wolves make him nervous, stands very still. Garyth places one hand on his sword hilt, but does not draw the weapon. He looks at the creature with a mix of wonder and guarded caution.
Mission, who is familiar with the wolves that run the slopes of Bannock's Ire, recognizes this animal as something special. He drops to a squat, and holds out his hand making low clucking noises with his tongue.
But it is Rennik who is most affected. He begins a low hum in the back of his throat, and the wolf stares into his eyes and matches him with a low growl of its own. When the animal reacts in this way, tears begin streaming down the Halflings face. Only the most gifted trackers and huntsmen of his people were given an animal companion. It is a great honor, and a sure sign that the gods looked on with favor.
He begins speaking in Halfling, calling to the wolf. But the wolf sits down on its haunches, and continues to give Rennik only its haunting stare. The Halfling comes to a realization. This is the choice. He can cut Cadfael's throat and leave the others here to die. The monk is swift, but no one will be able to catch him here in the jungle. But if he does, it is the final rejection of his god. The one from which there is no return. And the wolf will disappear back into the woods forever. Will you be a hero? The wolf seems to ask. Will you walk this path so that no other Halflings must walk it in your stead? Or will you run? As you have been running since Lorria died. This last choice is offered to you.
[You guys will be going to next level after you camp. Matt had told me Rennik would take a wolf as his animal companion after taking his next ranger level. I am sneaking the idea in a bit early.]
From: Matt
Subject: Re: An answer?
Rennik stares at the wolf, holding silent communication.
Why now? What had brought the wolf now? Had it been his communion with the nature spirits? Had they answered his need? Mielikki had abandoned him, he was sure of it. She had left him at the mercy of the dark god, at the mercy of the she-bitch, vulnerable in her very bosom...
...or had she? Was she testing him? Was she bending him like a hurricane bends a tree, seeing whether he would snap, whether he could survive in this new, harsh environment? Had she left him alone with the she-bitch and the dark god to see how he would fare? To see if he was worthy?
The wolf's eyes simply stared back, impassively. But there is understanding beneath them, a primal wisdom born of hardship and years abiding by the laws of nature.
Nature knows no vengeance.
There is a poetry in the wolf's eyes. A balance. Survive, kill for food, fight when in danger. Protect the pack.
Are these humans his pack? If they are, he has been a terrible alpha. Or even a beta. He's been the lone wolf, forced to skirt around the edges of the pack for survival.
This wolf was sent by Mielikki, his goddess, his patron. To show him the way. To remind him of the laws of nature, the struggles, the hardships of the wild. And, above all, that even a lone wolf can survive in the jungle - if it has the will.
Will burned in the wolf's eyes. It had a bearing, a presence. Confidence radiated from it, and it showed no fear of the humans. No fear, and no animosity.
Rennik breaks eye contact with the wolf and stands, still holding Cadfael by the collar, keeping the point of his dagger at the priest's neck. With the priest on his knees, Rennik stands almost eye to eye with him.
"It is not my place to take your life, even though you suckle at the teet of dark powers. If the jungle wishes to claim you, it will."
With that, he shoves Cadfael with his full weight behind the push, sending him onto his back. With that, he resheathes his dagger, and walks toward the wolf. Standing before it, the animal's head reaches Rennik's chin.
Moving his head to the side of the wolf's, he sniffs twice, then once more. The wolf sniffs him back, then licks his face twice. Rennik turns to the group again.
"My goddess has sent her messenger. Her strength. Her aid. She wants me to continue, to aid you all in reaching the mountain, to help you find your way through her domain. I don't know why she asks this of me, but I no longer doubt her wisdom."
"Friend Garyth, you are right. We must stay together, as a pack would stay together, if we wish to survive. I was being foolish and impulsive, and I apologize."
"This group may well still die in this jungle. I have no way of ensuring our survival, just as the mad priest has no way of guaranteeing the unborn child's life. No matter what he may say."
He turns to Mission. "I still think you foolish and blinded by emotions, but you are a worthy and formidable warrior. We are not so much different, you and I, in both respects. We were friendly once, and I hope we can be again. For the good of the pack... the good of the group... I hope we can put our differences behind us." He adds with the beginnings of a lopsided grin, "At least, until we are well away from this jungle."
"Now," he hesitates for a moment, and the word 'spellweaver' springs to his lips, but he holds it. "Farron. What can you tell me of the direction we must head?"