Subject: Invasion 2; Universal Ineptitude

(ODM: Man what a comedy of errors this round turned out to be)

"Guard," Buchek calls, stepping to the door of the cell and gripping the bars, "free me! I fear that the raiders I warned of are upon us, and they will certainly fire this building. I don't wish to roast in a cage! Free me! I pledge, by my ancestors and my blade, to defend this settlement against its attackers." [Diplomacy roll 12 - 10 (rushed) - 1 (skill) = 1, fail)

"You pledge by the ancestors of the barbarians that attack us! What good is that word! If this tower burns, you will burn with it!"

With that, the guard's moves to the door to view the courtyard.

"Flaming arrows! Cursed savages!"

He runs out to defend the outpost.

...

Agreed on their course of action, Erk and Kayla sprint for the tower, hoping to avoid a flaming arrow in the back long enough to free Buchek from the guards. Flaming arrows rain on either side of them, but they soon make it outside the bowmen's range.

Empathically called back to his master, Fancek Fa arches his back and sidesteps toward the door. Grabbing at the mace hanging by his side, the raider howls in anger (enraged) brings the heavy head down with all his might... but Fa was too fast, slipping backwards and bolting for the door. (Raider attack 12 v. AC 16, miss. Fa withdraws from combat, no AoO).

Holn sees Fa bolt through the door and almost loses his balance as the cat barrels around behind him. Startled, he looks to the door to see a brutish man in dark leathers, covered in grease and dark fat barreling towards him screaming.

[Initiative: Raider 20, Holn 8]

Telwyn, offbalance, drops his bow with a clatter and draws his short sword. Spinning toward his attacker, he swings at the marauder's neck, but the barbarian steps deftly behind the wooden support for the guard tower. Telwyn's sword, which would have found the marauder's throat, impacts against the wooden support sending a large chunk of wood flying back into the half-elf's face. [Attack 1, automatic failure]

Stepping from around the support, the marauder swings his heavy mace in a wide arc to crush Telwyn's skull, but the half-elf learned quickly from his opponent and backpedaled behind the ladder up the guard tower. The mace missed its mark [attack 6 vs. AC 16] but shatters the wooden ladder, sending bits of wood flying in all directions.

As Telwyn readies himself to strike again, he sees the dark shapes of two more marauders stepping onto the bridge from the other side of the river 50 feet away and another volley of arrows sail over his head.

...

Elotai struggles to keep his grip on the boy. "Stop! Do you want to battle the whole guard? The captain is calming things down!"

The boy struggles against him for only a moment, then his face reddens in shame. Turning toward the door, he almost collides with three guards rushing in from the guardhouse.

"Flaming arrows from the grass!"

The bar is again thrown into chaos, as the man push for the door. Elotai and Bermid are pressed back against the bar as the men arm themselves and push for the door.

The boy sits heavily on the floor beside the bar nad hangs his head. "I am a disgrace... to my family, to the guard... what am I even doing out here?"

His emotions in turmoil, he looks from the guards to the boy and back. He feels as though he once had a vision of flaming arrows, but he can't quite recall it. It wasn't a strong image, just of fire and flight... he wished he could remember more.

...

As the next volley of arrows lands, a powerful horn blast comes from the grass - a deep, powerful, resonant sound that starts low in pitch and finishes high. The battle begins in earnest.

Subject: Re: Invasion 2; Universal Ineptitude

Kayla looks up at Erk and comments, "I hope ev'ryone's a'ight," and continues running up the street.

Subject: Re: Invasion 2; Universal Ineptitude

It's really not important, but the marauder didn't have a 6 attack v. Telwyn... it was an 11 v. AC of 16. It would have been physically impossible for him to have rolled a 6 to attack.

Just a technicality, but I wanted to throw that out there.

Subject: Re: Invasion 2; Universal Ineptitude

Elotai crouches down next to him. ?You did nothing wrong,? he says, ?they just like to brawl. Now is not the time, Caro is under attack. If you need to prove your worth to yourself, help the guards defend this town.?

With that, Elotai stands. A quick preparatory spell [Mage Armour] is all he takes the time for before drawing his sword and making for the door of the inn. As he reaches the door, he turns back to look at the boy. ?Coming??

Subject: Re: Invasion 2; Universal Ineptitude

Erk replies to Kayla, ?I pray to silverbeard that all of us survive this night.?

He continues hurrying to the lockup. If another volley of arrows comes from overhead, he will hold his shield up like an umbrella for he and Kayla.

Subject: Re: Invasion 2; Universal Ineptitude

The sounds and gestures fly to Holn's lips again (Shocking Grasp) as he prepares himself to meet his smouldering assailant. Morning star or touch spell, this raider would have to be dealt with....

(OOC: Yeah, I'll risk an attack of opportunity for spell casting. At least I have an AC of 18 at the moment. Hope he misses.)

Subject: Re: Invasion 2; Universal Ineptitude

"You pledge by the ancestors of the barbarians that attack us! What good is that word! If this tower burns, you will burn with it!"

Pitching his voice so that it carries through the increasing clamor outside, Buchek says, in a flat, unsettling tone, "If you think I'll sit here and burn quietly you're a bigger fool than you look. Free me NOW, bastard, or I'll gut you when I free myself." He takes the bars of the door between his hands, shaking them to punctuate his words as he says "Open. This. Door." [using intimidate, of course]

Subject: Re: Invasion 2; Universal Ineptitude

Three to one and no help in sight; Telwyn knows when he is outmatched. He pauses only long enough to snatch up his bow before running back into the outpost as fast as he can.

Subject: Invasion 3; More Ineptitude

Pitching his voice so that it carries through the increasing clamor outside, Buchek says, in a flat, unsettling tone, "If you think I'll sit here and burn quietly you're a bigger fool than you look. Free me NOW, bastard, or I'll gut you when I free myself." He takes the bars of the door between his hands, shaking them to punctuate his words as he says "Open. This. Door."

[Intimidation 16 v. resist 9, success]

For a long moment, there is only the sound of action outside, but just as Buchek was about to howl in anger and frustration, the guard shows his head into the hallway from the common room.

Giving furtive glances, he warily moves closer to the iron door, fumbling for his key. He is just within Buchek's armsreach when a commotion of bodies tumbling into the common room startles him. The guards are shouting and scrambling for weapons, and the keyguard turns his head sharply to look back down the hall to the common room.

...

Erk and Kayla continue to run, now outside arrow range, but a glance back shows that several of the wooden buildings have started to catch. Erk reaches the entranceway to the tower to see a group of guards pushing against one another, some trying to come out and fight while others are trying to enter to grab weapons and equipment. Kayla is 30 feet behind.

...

The barbarian sees Holn standing before him and swings his mace at the sorcerer's head with a primal yell. Calmly, Holn takes one step backward, and the mace swings harmlessly in front of his face. [Attack 1, auto miss]. Strange sounds and gestures come to Holn's lips and hands as he reaches to touch the raider on his chest to deliver another jolt of electricity. As he speaks in a low whisper, the raider changes the direction of his mace and takes a backhand swipe aimed at Holn's ribcage. The blow lands squarely against the lower ribs, but glances harmlessly off, sending a ripple through the hazy shimmer surrounding the man. [Attack 17 v. AC 18, miss].

Finishing his incantation, Holn reaches for the stunned raider's mace arm to deliver his spell, but something in his eye frightens the barbarian enough to withdraw his arm suddenly and take a step backward. [Touch attack 5 v. AC 13, miss]

...

Telwyn glances back at the two figures advancing across the bridge, and sees several more moving shapes appear in the distance, moving hurriedly toward him. Reaching down for his bow, he makes to run back into the encampment - surely no bell is needed at this point to alert the guards to attack.

As bends to grab his weapon, he feels the displacement of air as the barbarian again swings hard over his head. With the marauder off balance and his bow in hand, Telwyn sprints down the path, hoping he doesn't catch an arrow in his back for his trouble.

...

Elotai stands, turning from the boy and drawing a small piece of leather from his spell pouch. Concentrating for a moment, he makes an unintelligible sound and his skin takes on a silvery sheen as though caught in moonlight. Drawing his sword, he turns to the boy.

"Coming?"

Bermid dully gets to his feet, blood clotted around his nose and upper lip, and walks almost in a daze toward the door where Elotai is standing.

Subject: Invasion 3; More Ineptitude

Elotai looks at the boy. He?d hoped that the breather would have woken him up a bit, but that didn?t seem to be the case. He turns to face the human fully, stepping aside from the door. ?What?s your name??

[OOC: I?m going to assume that Bermid gives Elotai his name.]

Babysitting a human child in a stupor was not high on Elotai?s list of things to be doing. But if Bermid was leading the expedition to the west, helping him could allow Elotai to gain a ?lawful? berth as a member. The guardhouse was probably the safest place to take the boy, if Elotai could keep him alive long enough to get him there.

?Bermid. I?ll take you to the guardhouse, maybe your companions are there.? He steps out of the door and looks around. ?If you?re coming, at least draw your sword.?

Subject: Re: Invasion 3; More Ineptitude

Kayla continues running down the street.

No, really, she does. Run, run, . . . run.

"Ah-hey, Erk's a quick one," she thinks to herself. As soon as she reaches the tower, she will try to slip in without anyone noticing. If someone questions her, Kayla intends to reply that she's looking for Telwyn. After all, he was going to stay with Buchek.

Subject: Re: Invasion 3; More Ineptitude

> Giving furtive glances, he warily moves closer to the iron door, fumbling for his key. He is just within Buchek's armsreach when a commotion of bodies tumbling into the common room startles him. The guards are shouting and scrambling for weapons, and the keyguard turns his head sharply to look back down the hall to the common room.

For a moment, Buchek thinks of snatching the keys from the guard and freeing himself. If he were truly trapped in this cell, fearing immolation, he'd probably do just that, but his knowledge of the cell's "back door" provides enough comfort to keep himself under control. If he were to assault the guard now, and Caro weren't burned to the ground by the raiders...

"Hurry, bastard."

Subject: Re: Invasion 3; More Ineptitude

OOC: It's just a touch, dude! Never mind the ozone and burnt hair smell, that's just you! I wish Holn had a decent melee strike.

Holn watches the barbarian warily, as his swipe misses. The ball is in the barbarian's court....

Subject: Re: Invasion 3; More Ineptitude

Erk bulls his way past the guards coming and going. ?Where is Buchek? Where did you put the prisoner?? he yells to them, as he begins searching his way through the tower. If he comes across Buchek and the guard with the keys, he will demand that the guard release the barbarian. If not, he will continue to search.

Subject: Re: Invasion 3; More Ineptitude

Once he's inside the compound, Telwyn continues to run as fast as he can toward the guard tower where Buchek is being held. He sheathes his short sword as he runs. (OOC: IIRC, you're allowed to combine sheathing/unsheathing a weapon with a move action, so he can still move 4x his base movement in this turn.) If he meets any raiders along the way that cannot be bypassed he will engage them at as long a range as possible with his bow.

Subject: No Turn Today

Sorry, guys. No turn today. It's actually gonna be spotty for me over the rest of this week and next, with regards to my getting turns out to you. I have 30,000 words I need to write for the 27th, after reading 93 pages of background material - and I'm going away this coming weekend.

So, that means I'm gonna be a bit strapped for time, and this game is a huge time commitment that can be easily postponed for a while until I get settled again.

Ideally I'll be able to get another turn out this week (if only as a means of procrastinating from the freelance work), but it won't be consistent.

I apologize, and I'll hit you guys back when I get a chance.

Subject: Kayla

Kayla falls to a slump in a fit of exhaustion. Breathing deeply, she looks around her. "Damn quiet fer an invasion," she thinks.

"Gawd, I'm starvin'," she rummages in her bag and finds a bit of squid jerky. "Awesome. Didna know I had summat this left!" Kayla begins gnawing happily on a dried tentacle and alternates between the cephalopod mollusk and her waterskin.

Subject: Re: Kayla

After languishing in prison for what seems like an age, Buchek decides to take advantage of some of the continuing education classes available to inmates in Caro. After perusing the course catalog carefully, he finally decides on a class in differential equations. He'd been intimidated by the subject matter at first, but his natural mathematical abilities soon rose to the fore, and before long he was surprised to find himself at the head of the class, and quite possibly more fulfilled than he'd ever been in his life.

Subject: Regrouping, and, er, Still More Ineptitude

(ODM: Okay, I'm still really busy, but if I don't start getting mails out to you guys, I'm afraid both you and I will forget what's going on. I don't want that. Plus, the cool stuff is yet to come, and I want to get there before I'm old and gray. So, I'm going to try to get out a turn as often as possible. That may mean missing a day here and there, but it's better than nothing. Without further ado...)

Buchek stares at the guard's hands as he trembles with the keys just out of arm's reach. The bustle of guards in the next room has caught his attention, and their strong arms has bolstered his resolve against the caged barbarian. Still, he glances furtively at Buchek before backing slowly away toward the door.

Erk pushes into the guardhouse along with the men, watching what should have been smooth, praciticed tactical procedures. Instead, the guards were fumbling - not through inexperience, but because of inebriation. The dwarf could tell many of them were in the cups as they grew frustrated with belt holes and bowstrings.

In the confusion, he looked for cells and saw an entryway to his left that led to a hall. Moving in that direction, away from the press of men, he bumped roughly into the back of a guard not watching where he was going.

Jumping suddenly in the air, the man let out a yelp and spun away from Erk toward an empty cell. A clanking jingle drew Erk's eye, as he realized the guard must have fumbled the large iron keyring in his fright - a good three feet inside the cell beside Buchek's.

As the keys fall, the diminutive form of Kayla slides in virtually unnoticed, popping up next to Erk and staring at Buchek's angry face, his white knuckles gripping the cell bars. With a look of mild surprise at the anger and frustration on the man's face, she chimes in with "Heya!", not quite sure of the situation she's stubled upon.

****

Bermid draws his sword meekly and follows after Elotai into the street. His depression turns quickly to confusion as he sees the streaming fire of arrows in the air and the blazing buildings. Elotai walks briskly across the street to the guardhouse, ignored by the passing guards now streaming out of the guardhouse toward the main gate.

Entering the common room, he sees several guards fumbling to equip themselves, and the backs of a dwarf and halfling just beyond the doorway to his left.

****

Telwyn sheathes his sword and runs, feeling the heat from a flaming arrowhead brush within inches of his cheek and bury itself in the dirt ahead of him. There doesn't appear to be any marauders in his path, but the war cries and horns behind him give speed to his steps.

(you can sheath and take 2x your speed, not 4x. So, 60 ft for you)

****

Holn watches the barbarian recover his glancing blow with agility, but also amazement. The mace should have crushed ribs and given him a satisfying crunch, but instead felt like he had hit a tree. He levels another blow, a little more warily this time, aimed at the intersection of neck and shoulder, but his confusion at Holn's magical armor makes his attack obvious, and the sorcerer twists away from it [attack 6, miss].

Again, Holn speaks the strange words, calling internal energies to his fingertips, and his opponent makes another attempt, a desperate arcing swing that misses utterly [attack 8, miss]. As Holn reaches calmly for the barbarian's shoulder, he backpedals away in fear, sure in his knowledge that he wants no part of this strange mystic [touch attack 5, miss].

There is a look of panic in the raider's eyes, and Holn can't decide whether he is about to make a last all out attack, or run in terror.

(WTF?!? This is getting ridiculous. I had to guess that you were using the Shock again, since you only said the ball was in the barbarian's court, last time)

Subject: Re: Regrouping, and, er, Still More Ineptitude

Wooohoo! We're playing again!

Buchek watches unbelieving as the keys go flying, landing in the cell next to him, and throws back his head, howling in a mixture of fury and frustration as he begins shaking the bars before him. As he shouts, the fury that has been building in him bursts forth, screaming through his veins in an adrenaline rush that blots out all reason. [ie--Buchek is going into a rage]. In a remote corner of Buchek's mind, his rational self watches dispassionately, disconnected from his body, as his arms flex against the cell's bars [ie--Buchek, in his enraged (and strength enhanced) state, is attempting to free himself by bending the bars of his cell].

If Buchek's bend bars is successful, and assuming that other players' actions don't necessitate a change in plans, Buchek will tear his axe from its peace bindings and run from the prison into the melee outside, howling like a madman all the while.

Subject: Re: Regrouping, and, er, Still More Ineptitude

Standing outside the cells, Erk hears the howl of rage from one of them, and guesses the barbarian is in that one. He yells out, ?We?re here, Buchek! Give us a moment, and we will have you out!?

Turning over his shoulder to Kayla he says, ?Grab those keys; see if one fits the cell locks.? Then he will rush over to Buchek?s cell door and speak to him, trying to calm him down.

Subject: Re: Regrouping, and, er, Still More Ineptitude

Telwyn continues to run, heading for the guard tower.

Subject: Re: Regrouping, and, er, Still More Ineptitude

Elotai turns to Bermid. ?Are these your companions?? he asks, gesturing at Erk and the halfling.

Just then, he hears a roar from further inside. What have they got caged in there, he wonders, some kind of wild animal? He had seen the wolf in his visions, but the wolf wouldn?t make such a noise.

[OOC: If Bermid acknowledges Erk and Kayla then Elotai will go with him into the room with the cells.]

Subject: Re: Regrouping, and, er, Still More Ineptitude

I blindly hit the reply button this morning for Holn's reaction. Just so everyone knows:

Holn takes a 5-foot step backwards and performs a ready action to melee-touch the barbarian if he closes the distance to attack again.

(OOC: I want the initiative.)

Subject: Regrouping

Kayla eyes the cell with the keys, and wonders if she can squeeze through the bars. If they look wide enough, she'll walk through and grab the keys, hoping the guard doesn't see her. With the keys, she'll open the lock and follow Buchek.

If they're too narrow, Kayla motions to Erk and whispers, "Get in front of the lock and keep talkin!" while moving in front of the lock at Buchek's cell. She hopes that Buchek is bending bars unassociated with the lock. After checking to see if anyone can see her standing in front of Erk, she'll try to pick the lock with her lockpicks.

Subject: Re: Regrouping

Erk will do whatever he can to both calm Buchek down, and to cover Kayla while she works her magic.

Subject: Re: Regrouping

From the corner of his mind where Buchek's rational self observes, he wonders how it is that he came to be wearing these tattered, purple pants.

:)

OOC--it'd be funny if Buchek had screwed up the lock, and wasn't able to bend the bars far enough to escape. He could always escape through the sewer grate, but still.

How long does a barbarian's rage last, anyway? Assuming that Erk doesn't succeed in calming Buchek down, is there any chance that the rage will last long enough for Buchek to take a couple of raiders' heads before he calms down?

Subject: Kayla's action?

Did I miss another email, or did Clara not send an action for Kayla? I don't want to go on until I know what the halfling's up to.

Subject: Re: Kayla's action?

Looks like the list must be having problems again. Here is Kayla's turn:

Kayla eyes the cell with the keys, and wonders if she can squeeze through the bars. If they look wide enough, she'll walk through and grab the keys, hoping the guard doesn't see her. With the keys, she'll open the lock and follow Buchek.

If they're too narrow, Kayla motions to Erk and whispers, "Get in front of the lock and keep talkin!" while moving in front of the lock at Buchek's cell. She hopes that Buchek is bending bars unassociated with the lock. After checking to see if anyone can see her standing in front of Erk, she'll try to pick the lock with her lockpicks.

Subject: Looming battle

(this is just ridiculous)

Buchek's howling rage shakes the iron bars with loud clanging and clattering, but the large hinges on the iron door hold fast [Strength check 18 v. bend DC 24, fail].

Erk yells out, "We're here, Buchek! Give us a moment, and we will have you out!" Turning over his shoulder to Kayla he says, "Grab those keys; see if one fits the cell locks."

Kayla, seeing the keys in the adjoining cell were beyond her reach, slides up against the iron bars, warily avoiding Buchek's grasping fists. Whispering to Erk as she passes him, "Get in front of the lock and keep talkin!", she reaches inside her backpack for her lock picking kit and selects the appropriate tools for the job. [Action used to get her gear out of her pack and ready, a pick attempt can be made next turn]

Erk moves toward the cell in an attempt to calm the raging barbarian, but Kayla's words pull him up short. Understanding her intent, he uses his wide body to shield the view from the doorway to the common room, and makes his placating gestures from further away.

Elotai's words receive no words from Bermid, whose eyes have widened in shock at the howling, primal outburst from the adjoining hallway. His absent nod is the only indication that these are, in fact, the people he had arrived with.

The howling in the cell hallway draws attention from two of the guards in the common room, though most exit the tower running toward the bridge. [Elotai and Bermid would notice them moving to investigate]

***

The barbarian, seeing Holn's confident, passive stance, loses confidence entirely and thinks better of his assault. Running from the invulnerable mystic, he heads back toward the bridge and reinforcements. Seeing his adversary depart, Holn surveys the scene.

His concentration on the barbarian's mace consuming him, he hadn't noticed the flaming arrows at all. Looking around, he sees the last volley clear the wall and watches as several roofs have been set ablaze. In the flickering light, he sees a gray streak low to the ground heading back towards the tower, followed by Telwyn, running at great speed in the same direction.

Turning, Holn sees a rush of guards heading in his direction, and decides it would be best not to be the point man for the assault. He also runs back toward the tower, if nothing else than to get behind a line of armored fighters. [I'm assuming this is what he would do if the barbarian ran - in the future, give me a contingency plan, or at least thought, so I have a little more to go on]

[Jake: to answer your question, the rage lasts 8 rounds. It has now been one. If they can get you out of the cell, you could conceivably split a head or two before you crashed]

Subject: Clarification

Ignore the "ridiculous" comment... I had at first had Kayla picking the lock and failing miserably, but then realized she'd need to unpack her stuff first. So, ignore the man behind the curtain.